


Well That's Awkward

by AntaresofJuly



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: M/M, magic!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-14
Updated: 2015-12-14
Packaged: 2018-05-06 14:39:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5420873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AntaresofJuly/pseuds/AntaresofJuly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How the citizens of Central City got their eyefuls of superhero/villain flirtation. Also, I suck at naming.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Well That's Awkward

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pretzel_logic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pretzel_logic/gifts).



> This was inspired by the amazing pretzel_logic's tumblr post here: http://pretzel-log1c.tumblr.com/post/135068647091/i-am-still-disappointed-i-never-found-out-a-way-to
> 
> I should probably warn that I don't know any thing about Jinx other than she uses magic and has pink hair.
> 
> Also, the awkward flirt lines come from the almighty Internet! Enjoy!

It would be one of those epic battles that was gonna be remembered through generations. Oh yeah Cisco was sure of it. The rouges assembled to battle the Flash for the first time in front of cameras of all the news media in Central City. There were literally so many cameras they probably could make a holographic movie out of it.

The rouges, not just Captain Cold and Heatwave this time, but also some other colorful supervillains they have and haven't seen before, were all excited to be in the most obvious heist of the year. Especially this new girl with shiny pink hair and ridiculously large eyes. Cisco hadn't decided what to call her yet. He wondered what her power was gonna be. She was holding a gun though. So it was possible she didn't get any.

The battle started pretty normally, with some mild insults and bad puns exchanged: you can't get away with what your doing blah blah blah oh what if I do yada yada, just basic flirtatious stuff like always (not that Barry would ever admit it). Then they went right into action. Cold engaged the Flash with Cisco's cold gun while Peek-a-Boo tried to attack from behind. Golden Glider was too busy preventing Heatwave from setting the building on fire to cause any real trouble. Pink-haired girl and another guy were holding hostages while Rainbow Raider coerced the bank manager to open the vault.

It took about 20 minutes for Barry to knock out Peek-a-boo and throw Captain Cold into a nearby music fountain. He went straight to the hostages afterwards.

"Careful Barry!" Caitlin called out. Cisco agreed, "dude! We don't know what are this girl and guy's abilities yet!"

They were not hopeful though. Barry, as usual, ran headfirst into the unknown without much thought. Within a second he had the guy tied to a chair, grabbed the gun from the girl's grip, tripping her to the ground, and started moving hostages to safety. That was when things became really weird. Well, weirder than usual.

The girl looked at her empty hand, then at the Flash, then at the floor she was sitting on, and back at Barry. She pouted and visibly took in a deep breath, and screamed a string of something that on retrospect sounded sort of like "GO FLIRT LAMELY WITH THE PERSON YOU ARE MOST ATTRACTED TO AND MAKE AN ASS OUT OF YOURSELF, NOW!" And they could see from the various news media that the Flash stumbled, and came to a complete stop.

"Barry? You okay?" Cisco and Caitlin asked simultaneously.

"I... I'm fine I think?" Barry said, sounding confused, "I just really need to do this thing first." And with that, he dashed out of the bank...

"Oh god! I think we need to warn Iris, or--" (That's Caitlin.)

...to where Cold just climbed out of the fountain, all wet and dripping and looked totally pissed. He skidded to a stop just a few feet in front of Cold.

"Hey Cold, you know why your alias is ironic?"

"What?" The criminal spit out some fountain water, irritation and confusion in his voice, poor fucker. The cameras were now all trained on them.

"'cause you are so hot it must be you who started the global warming!"

The whole world went silent. They might actually just heard the sound of Leonard Snart's jaw hitting the floor.

"Ummm, what are you doing Barry?" Cisco asked incredibly, "Why are you trying to seduce Captain Cold with weirdness?" But Barry turned off the com link and they had to rely on the various news cameras from then on. Cisco pulled up all the camera feeds. (Un)fortunately, they could still see and hear everything this way.

Captain Cold was flustered slightly for a moment, but soon his expression hardened again and he narrowed his eyes dangerously. It was still visible even with the goggles on. "Is this some pathetic mind game of yours, Flash? Save it! Just make your pitch!" He said with so much spite Cisco had to wince.

"You know, we should really be like the cocoa and mini marshmallows you really like, with you so hot and me on top of you."

Cold gaped and took a step back, totally flabbergasted for some reason, almost trapping himself back into the fountain. Barry flashed forward to rescue him from that fate. Annnnnd he didn't let go.

And Cold didn't seem to mind though, he just stared really intensely up at Barry for a long moment. (Cause he was actually slightly shorter than Barry, Cisco realized with some surprise. )

"What do you want?" was his quiet question.

"I just want to lick every inch of your skin all over your gorgeous body." Barry basically purred, with a lower and sultrier voice that none of them had heard before.

Geez! Cisco covered his ears, "Oh man, I so do not need to hear this!" But it was too late. The damage was already done. His ears were permanently tarnished now, and Caitlin's irritated "SHUSH!" did nothing to help.

And oh Cold could blush. Who would've guessed! The villain turned bright pink and his jaw fell ever further. One of the cameras facing Barry pulled in, and they could see their hero's eyes flickered down to the villain's lips.

"Your lips are so obscenely red right now, I think it's a fitting place for my--" Lucky for all, a hand shoot up to cover his mouth, preventing whatever monstrous thing from rolling out next. They could hear Cold's mouth closed with an audible "click." Yep, that was definitely Captain Cold's hand, saving the day instead of ruining it for once. And man was beet-red like he might catch on fire any moment.

Somehow, Barry still managed to speak behind all those fingers, with deeeep emotion none the less "You wrapped yourself up so tight, with all your lies and pretenses. But you’re like a gift, Snart, the best part about all your layers is getting you out of them."

Snart finally pushed him away, cheeks still red like tomatoes, and averted his gaze. "What is wrong with you!" He hissed, rather softly, then he seemed to have an epiphany, "Jinx!" He turned and shouted to the girl who was standing with the other rogues who were raptly watching their fearless leader being publicly embarrassed by their archenemy. "I just knew it! I should've never agreed to bring you on the job. You are Fir--" But he was cut off by Barry's hands cupping his tomato cheeks.

"Come on, babe. I want to see these pretty, pretty, icy blue eyes."

Barry lifted the goggles, and Cold's eyes did look pretty, steely and wide and lashes and all that.

Then they were kissing, eyes automatically closed, with Cold dripping all over, and Barry hugging him tight, and cameras flashing white from every angle. They've undoubtedly made national news by now.

Then Barry vibrated a little and Cold moaned and hugged him back. Yeah, and headlines for tomorrow morning.

Their impression of kissing fish lasted for what feels like five minutes. It was beautiful, Cisco nearly sobbed. Before you said anything, it was not just him! Caitlin went crazy for it, judging by the sniffing and simpering coming from her direction at the same time.

Finally the pair decided to return from La La Land, and finished the Epic Kiss with a sinful separating "pop!" The spell seemed to break with that, both parties staggered back a few steps, all dazed.

Snart managed not to fall back into the fountain this time, and Barry raised a hand to gently touch his own lips, eyes wide, and probably realized they were being recorded by a million cameras, because he took a look around and squawked.

Snart might not be in any better shape, with all his rogues snickering at him, but he squared his shoulders and forcefully put on his trademark shit-eating smirk. That man was brave. Cisco had to give him that.

"Well, well, well, what can I say, Scarlet," he drawled at Barry while retreating back to his crew who had gathered in front of a giant window, "as it turns out, some people are worth melting for."

With a final wink, he stepped into the window's glassy surface with the rest of the the Rogues, and they were all gone.

Barry didn't even think to look after them. He just stood there, blinking, with a stupid grin slowly spreading across his face, in front of all those dame cameras.

"Joe's gonna be so pissed." Caitlin murmured. "You think we should maybe give Barry a slight shock perhaps?"

"Well, on the bright side," Cisco pressed the level-1 electric-shock button, "no one got hurt and the rogues seemed to forget their loot. Too eager watching Captain Cold smooching the Flash. Annnd," he said with a big grin of his own, "we now know that Jinx's a witch, and that guy's power's pretty awesome! I'm gonna call him the Mirror Master!"

 


End file.
